Maternasty

I pinky-swear promise that now that I am pregnant, this blog will not be all pickles and ice cream, maternity, nursery, baby stuffy. While I can not guarantee that these things will not be mentioned from time-to-time (except for the pickles-I'm more of a popcorn with an entire cube of butter kind of girl when I need my salt fix), I'll do my best to remember what it's like to be not-pregnant and still remotely cool and write posts accordingly.

But first, you will have to allow me the opportunity to vent about one particular thing about pregnancy that drives me absolutely insane, and that, my friends, is maternity- or what I like to call "MaterNasty" clothes. Why is it that most maternity clothes, no matter the source, are ugly, cheap-looking, and (here's the kicker) usually totally over-priced?  Don't get me wrong, there's also some cheap stuff out there, but it looks like it fell off of the Walmart plus-size truck and then rolled around in the dirt for a few weeks before Motherhood Maternity decided to shovel it off the cement like road-kill and add it to their racks.

Shall I provide some examples? Here are some affordable beauties from the "Loved" by Heidi Klum line:

Heidi- what is it about being pregnant that makes it acceptable to wear acid wash sweat pants? (Hint: Nothing) Can you imagine if these bad boys came down the Project Runway? I'm pretty sure Michael Kors would purse his lips and then keel over and fall off his stool because he had finally been rendered speechless.

And then there's this beauty, for the Disney Afficionada, who doesn't want to sacrifice her love of the Mouse for the sake of her developing fetus:

Anyways, you get the picture.

So, for me, the challenge has been buying as little as possible to get me through the next 5 months, and still managing to buy things that make me feel like "me" and not some cotton-lycra, ugly print version of myself. Fortunately for us preggos out there, it's relatively easy these days to find non-maternity alternatives to keep us looking civilized during these challenging days. I was on the hunt to find a few basics for my trip to Las Vegas last weekend (don't go there when you're pregnant, btw) and thought I'd share with you a few Mater-Not-y pieces that you can keep in the closet after you squeeze that little thing out. 

I swooped up this comfy-as-pajamas dress in my favorite raspberry hue at Anthro last Friday, and I must say, I almost felt pretty in it: 

Velvet Whirligig Dress, $138

Here I am pretending that being sober is fun with the hubs during dinner at Dos Caminos. At least I had my queso fundido.

With both of my boys, I was fortunate to be at my my most pregnant and gigantor in the summer months, which allowed  me to forgo any kind of waist-line and just throw on a dress almost every day. I may have to add this little number from MinkPink to my current collection for the coming months:

Minkpink "Malibu Stacy" Dress, $101.56

And then there are the tunics. Tunics are everywhere these days ladies and they equal instant pregnancy joy because, not only are they cute and comfy, but they often obscure the butt and thighs, allowing for maximum carbohydrate consumption during gestation. I almost splurged on this striped version by Splendid because stripes are my particular brand of heroine, to quote my beloved Edward Cullen:

Splendid Stanzas Tunic, $88

With a little adjustment of the waist tie- it was perfect. We'll let that one go on sale, but we'll be watching like a hungry tiger. Zara has a good selection of blousy tunics that would fit the bill, like this breezy white v-neck version, which I'm certain would become a work and play staple of mine: 

Zara V-neck top, $49.90

Now if only I can nab those purple pants with an elastic waist-band....Pants are a whole different story, that perhaps, we will save for my next "maintaining your dignity while pregnant" segment. But, before I go, I will leave you with the overdue, semi-profile, stomach reveal, as previously intended: 

I told you, I like raspberry.

Drum Roll Please

OK, I know what you all are thinking right now- that I should probably just go ahead and change the name of this blog to Haute Mama Weekly because I've really been slacking on my HMD duties. Well, the truth of the matter is, despite all of my I-need-another-kid-like-I-need-a-friggin'-hole-in-my-head talk, I am... drum-roll please...PREGNANT- 14 weeks pregnant to be exact. So deal with it. 

I know, I know, I'm all talk and I've been secretly harassing the hubs every day for the past 6 months about having another kid because apparently, I've forgotten how much I enjoy sleeping, not having E cups and traveling without a massive diaper bag. I also must have forgotten how much I do not enjoy being pregnant.

Up until recently I was on a strict diet of complex carbs only, with the occasional tub of ice cream when I could stomach it, and I'm starting to resemble a Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon version of myself. Bedtime has just recently moved from 8:30 to 9pm, which leaves me about 15 more minutes to finish up this post, and waddle into bed.

Anyways, I had been postponing this announcement post because I wanted to accompany it with a cute, early-bump photo of myself in something non-maternity and stylish, looking all glowy and excited, but the truth of the matter is, I already look like I am about six months preggs, I am in full-on elasto-gear and the thought of making myself even remotely photo-ready just exhausts me. So, instead, here is a sneak peek of what I will look like in about 4 months, just to remind us all of the amazing capabilities of the human body.

And, we're off.

The Obsession Continues

The boys took an unexpected trip to spend the night at their grandma's house and the hubs is back to work in the wee hours tomorrow, so I was left here to contemplate washing my floors, which are bordering on unsanitary right now, ooooor, parking my butt in front of the computer to catch up on the latest issue of Lonny.

I don't think I need to tell you what I chose.

And let me tell you my friends, I chose wisely, because this month's issue features my SWF design crush, Angie Hranowsky. Though I can't say it's my favorite work of her's, my girl Angie doesn't disappoint.

I love this room because it's just so do-able, you know? 

Purple Tufted Couch- you are awesome and you deserve better pillows than that. Otherwise, love it.

In other, non-Angie related, but still cool design-related news, the designer behind one of my regular blog reads, Jen Ramos of Made By Girl, has opened a new e-store called Cocoa & Hearts to sell her abstract paintings and they totally capture Jen's super feminine and glamorous sensibility. It would probably be resigned to the garage next to the boar's head Ryan keeps threatening to bring home, because all this pink and lavender would clearly threaten his manhood, but still, I need it: 

Infinite by Jen Ramos, $500

Off to not wash my floors and maybe catch the premier of the RHONJ for the 2nd time, because I'm feeling a little indulgent. xoxo.

Check me out at LSP!

Was hoping to have this posted on Friday, but blogger was down Thursday night and somebody desperately needed to get her hair did on Friday morning, so, better late than never, I guess. Anyhoo- I put together a little something for my favorite photog and fortunate-for-me friend, the talented Lindsay Stafford. Here's a sneak peek of what you'll find- so make sure you hop on over to her site for more of my spring ensembles!

J Crew embellished tank top
$60 - net-a-porter.com

Zara blazer
$100 - zara.com

TopShop circle skirt
$110 - topshop.com

Kate spade
$225 - endless.com

Kate Spade gold ring
$95 - nordstrom.com

Kate Spade flower stud earring
$68 - zappos.com

Worth the h-ULLA-baloo.

Please excuse the ridiculous post title, but I just recently caught a glimpse of the Ulla Johnson Spring 2011 line, and am now contemplating opening another credit card...or bank robbery. Check it:

Ummm, ridiculous.

Already wearing it everyday in my mind.

Hi tank top- let's drink some margaritas together.

Ulla-ve it.

Give me a break already, it's Mother's Day.

Hope it's a good one Mamas. We deserve it.

Cinco de Yummo

 If people are what they eat- then I married a wet super burrito with a side of street tacos. Clearly- the hubs loves him some Mexi food- and if he had his druthers, we would celebrate Cinco de Mayo almost every day. In reality, we come pretty close to that, and we tend to have some pretty impressive Mexican feasts, courtesy of the hubster, at least once a week. He occasionally goes all out and journeys into some less desirable regions to hit-up authentic Mexican markets (Mi Tierra on East 14th is his go-to) and the results are always tasty. What can I say, marriage has its perks, and in my case, taco night is one of them.

While I'd like to give him all the credit for something for a change, the real truth of the matter is that, in my opinion, a Mexican meal is really only as good as the massive pile of guacamole that you're dipping it into, and when it comes to the guac around here, I'm the one with the fail-proof family recipe.

Passed down from my beloved dad, a master of the art of dip preparation, this recipe is quick and easy, and if I do say so myself, the perfect balance of salty and zesty. So here it is mamas, have it at:

2 Avacados- should be relatively firm, but not so firm that you can't make an impression with your thumb using slight pressure
1/2 of 1 small fresh lime
Garlic salt to taste (about 1-2 tsp)
2 spoonfuls of  Herdez Casera salsa or Herdez Salsa Verde (or fresh pico de gallo)
1/4 cup freshly chopped cilantro leaves
1 jalapeno- seeded

I like to cut my avos and use a nice big spoon to scoop out the contents. I've found a fork to be the best "masher" for an ideal texture. It's a good idea to always leave at least one of your avo pits in the dip, as this will keep it from browning for much longer.

Next, I squeeze the half lime directly into the mashed avo and mix.

Now, here's the key people- Garlic Salt. Regular salt will do, and, truth be told, sometimes I add a little extra plain ol' salt in with my garlic salt cause I'm crazy like that, but Garlic Salt will make magical guacamole love happen and just gives it that extra zing. You'll see.

Now for the salsa. Some of you may think this is cheating and maybe it is. You could just finely dice some tomatoes ( I like romano tomatoes for this, because they are the firmest and have the least juice/seeds in the middle) and some red onion and call it a day, but because I'm a flavor machine and we're riding this bus all the way to flavor town, trust me on the salsa. Chances are, when you're making a legit Mexi dish, you'll have some fresh pico de gallo around, but if you're poor like us and fresh pico de gallo has to be rationed in favor of paying utility bills, then Herdez is the stuff. I actually first discovered Herdez at a real Mexican supermarket while in Mexico staying at my friend's house. We love it because it comes in little 1 oz cans for 99 cents(sounds scary, I know), but it is surprisingly legit and perfect because we inevitably throw out half of those big old jars when we are eating for just the family. The ranchera works nicely, but occasionally I mix it up with some of the salsa verde for a zingier, spicier blend. Be mindful when adding your salsa- too much will take away from the texture- and a good guac should be chunky- not too creamy. I usually start with a single spoonful, and add more as needed. I'd say, for 2 avo guac, I usually use 2 small spoonfuls or less.  If you want more texture, supplement with the diced romanos and red onion as needed.

Please note, it is important to have lots of tortilla chips handy during guac preparation so that you can taste throughout each step as you add ingredients to gauge the amount necessary for each. Plus, I sometimes find that I have a tendency to go too salty when I'm not tasting with the already salty chip on my tongue.

Chop up your cilantro finely and add  the diced leaves in increments.  Taste as you add to achieve desired cilantro-ness. I like it because it adds a hint of freshness to the guac, but too much of it can totally overwhelm the dish, since it's a really strong flavor and scent.

Same goes for the jalapeno- dice very finely, remove seeds, add, mix and add more as needed- or eliminate altogether if your prepping for kids or lame people who don't like spiciness.

And- ¡Ya está! There you have it. I know six paragraphs is a little ridiculous, but clearly, I take my guacamole very seriously. As should you.

Feliz Cinco de Mayo Mamas Calientes!