Monday, January 17, 2011

HMD Golden Globe Coverage

Overall, I have to say I was a little let down by the majority of  looks at the Golden Globe's last night. There may have been only a select few going home with awards in their hands, but there seemed to be even fewer winners in the style category. OK, ok,  so maybe I'm being a little too cynical, and there were certainly some very clear stand-outs. What's that you say? You're dying to hear my opinion? Especially considering the fact that I am wearing fat jeans and Uggs so old that the lining is exploding through holes above the sole? Oh, alright, but just a few:

First up, the HMD winners: 
Maybe I was craving rainbow sherbert last night, but I was all about these sherberty looks... 

I'm not sure the pics do it justice, but Emma Stone was a total bombshell in this minimalist peach, backless number. The dress color and the hair color definitely suited her. I kind of wanted to make out with her.

I'm usually totally wierded-out by Claire Danes and her mega-torso, but she looked stunning in this dress. Again, totally minimal, elegant, backless. Also, looks like Claire got the memo about Pantone's color of the year, Honeysuckle. Love it.

Yes please Kyra Sedgwick, more mango. Also, earrings=gimme.

Green was another big color of the night and I seriously heart green, especially the deep forest-y tone being rocked by these ladies: 

Peggy Olson looks pretty hot when  her forehead isn't being assaulted by the ugliest bangs ever

Mila Kunis would probably look hot if she came in a burlap sack, but instead, she makes it look easy being green. 

But not all of the green was so great. Behold, my first loser of the night:

Now, I know the burlap sack theory holds true for Angie as well, but c'mon, I think Blanch Deveraux looked hotter in this number when she wore it. Brad, on the other hand, was looking refreshingly un-homeless and goatee braid-free. He sure does clean-up nice. I wish I could say the same for Johnny: 

I'm so over this look for him. 

Anne was also rocking the Dynasty shoulders. I wasn't a fan.

To be honest with you, I wasn't sure whether to put this dress in the "winners" or "losers" category. When I first saw her, I was like "Wow, Betty Draper looks smoking hot." And she did. The color was amazing, her hair was perfection, but then, after a minute, I started to feel visually assaulted by her "golden globes" and the whole thing started to reek a little bit of desperation, season 3 Betty-style. 

And then Jimmy Fallon was all, "Boobs." In his mind. 

In other Mad Men news: 

People think I'm crazy, but John Hamm is really only hot to me when he's Don Draper. Maybe it's the hair that makes him, but when he's John Hamm, he's just kind of, John know? And (now I'm just getting mean) his girlfriend is total dogmeat.

This look makes me sad. In fact,  Michelle kind of looks like she's going to burst into tears here. Add a long sleeve with an elastic ruffle wrist and a bad perm, and this pretty much looks exactly like what I wore to first communion.

Save it for your wedding day, forehead. 

I wonder if they've got a spot reserved for him on Celebrity rehab, season 15, yet? 

Not much to say about what he's wearing here,  but thought I would share with you all that this guy was my partner in an acting class at UCLA and I thought he kind of stunk. Apparently, I have no future in casting.

"And I'd like to thank Jesus for inspiring my look tonight..."
He did deserve that award though.

I'm not sure if it's the new haircut, or the puberty 'stache, but this guy has just totally lost his zing.

And finally, I thought Tina Fey looked really good, but seriously, I had no idea she was hiding this little guy away at home. I mean, give him a pointy hat and a wheel barrow and I'll find him a real nice spot in my garden. He must be really kind and funny and tall, in other places.

Ok, enough. I think I better quit before kharma catches up with me and my monitor sets on fire and scorches my eyebrows off.

P.S. If you really want more mean-spirited and self-righteous commentary, please feel free to hit me up on g-chat today, cause I'm bursting at the seams here. 

P.PS. Tia, I didn't forget you. Happy Bday! Stay tuned. Wink wink.  xoxo


  1. Jess - Seriously,,, I am about to pee in my pants...that was too great! thanks for my morning belly laugh - i needed that!

  2. Kate pointed me toward your blog and that was HILARIOUS! Especially sine I (gasp!) forgot about the golden globes and didn't watch it. Thank you for the morning laughs!